I almost titled this post “Admitting Defeat.” I stopped myself, because I am totally not defeated, I just know when to seek help.
I have been looking at November with trepidation for quite some time, and now that it is here, I am doing everything in my power to stay sane. I’m preparing to present two workshops at the American Orff Schulwerk Association Conference, my biggest and most prestigious gig EVER. This means prepping visuals, notes, playlists, packing lists, and subplans, as well as mentally and physically preparing to spend five days away from my baby. I’m traveling the following weekend to support my talented hubby and in-laws at a talent competition. The following week is Thanksgiving; thankfully I will not be traveling again, but my MIL is coming to stay the week, and I will be hosting dinner for the three of us.
I was starting to feel really stressed about maintaining all the odds and ends of life amidst all the traveling. Every weekend, I shop and prep food for the week from scratch, do my Home Blessing cleaning, and relax and recharge for the week. Losing two weekends in a row, and then having to think about Thanksgiving, in addition to recovering from travel is A LOT to handle!
I take joy and pride in cooking healthy food from scratch while staying on a budget, but I knew that grocery shopping and food prep was just more than I could handle. I made the decision that November’s dinners were going to come from Let’s Dish, a local meal assembly store, and while I was at it, I’d pay the extra $15 to have them make them up for me. I also decided that Thanksgiving was going to get some help from Trader Joe. I am a little sad, because it is my first Thanksgiving in my own house, and my mind was doing joyful somersaults thinking of all the great recipes I could try. However, taking the holiday to actually rest and enjoy the company of family sounded better to me than zesting citrus and trimming green beans by hand.
It may not seem like it, but this is a huge step for me. To accept that I cannot do it all is something that I have struggled my entire life to learn. Accepting help with food preparation is not a sign of weakness. It will not condemn my family to a life of pesticide and GMO riddled illness because hands besides mine assembled the ingredients. I know my priorities, and I know that to maintain balance, sometimes you need to let things go. I feel so much better having outsourced some of the work for my Mom/Wife job so that my other job can come first this month. Still, any prayers and positive vibes you can send my way are appreciated!